Airport Checklist

The George Bush Intercontinental Airport in Houston is pretty nice. I know that because I am currently 4 hours deep into an 8 hour layover there (revision: with delays the layover was almost 12 hours). There are a few requirements on my own personal checklist that make an airport a good one.
(This is focused on the USA)

• First and foremost: Is there free wifi? Please, don't expect me to pay for it - it's 2017. Also, make it fast.
• Food selection; unlike some people I don't care about having fancy restaurants, I am not going to use them anyway. All I want is fast-food, that means McDonald's, Burger King, Wendy's etc.  It's cheap(er), it's fast, and it tastes good. You pretty much know what you are getting there. It might be surprising, but I have been to some airports that don't have any. I'm looking at you Laguardia and pretty much any airport in California. No, I do not want your airport sushi and $15 crepes. Spending all day in airports is already not ideal, so I try to make it better by granting myself a free day and inhaling some over processed trash (but it tastes good, right?). The opposite of which would be the incredibly appetizing "Todd English's Figs", a real restaurant in LaGuardia. What a meal, yum.
• Of course this is pretty much all void if you have lots of money to spend. Unfortunately, I am not there yet.
• At some airports when you go from a domestic terminal to an international terminal you have to go through security again. I hate this. Please airports, no.